trippple nippples is PPP

I recently switched from using gross messy old cd's to a brand new mp3 player. It's not perfect by any means, on plugging it into my computer I found that the 2 gigs promised on the packaging is actually only 1.7 gigs. This makes for a very cramped environment in there, electro-certified bangers rub elbows with alt.metal epics while sparse keytard folk songs make disapproving noises over the multiple a-milli remixes. And the line-up! Don't even get me started. Even four hundred songs, shuffled endlessly can get tiring, so I am always removing large chunks of music and replacing it with newer, fresher music. Most tracks only make it through one or two purges before they go to that big recycling bin in the sky or if they are lucky, the cryonics chamber of my 8 gig zip drive.

Today we're are going to talk about one band that has consistently made the cut despite having only three songs and a handful of remixes to their name.

PPP aka trippple nippples

trippple nippples is made up of three young ladies from the island nation of Japan. In the frontispiece for this essay you will see qrea nippple in her mutant cow suit at the bottom. Above her is yuka nippple and then nabe nippple, in blue.
The cow suits, I suspect, have something to do with their claims that they are only trying to help humanity by shooting magic miracle milk into our minds.

In their self titled track, PPP, the nippples lament the persecution they suffer while spreading the message of this miracle milk.
"We just want people to be happy, Yeah?" They sing, as if they are unsure how anyone could remain glum while listening to their bouncy party music. I certainly can't.

Then there is RIP Meat, an ode to the meatpacking industry maybe? A concise summary of selected chapters of Upton Sinclair's "The Jungle" possibly? The nippples apologize for the last time in the chorus and urge us to put it out of our minds. I think this is the first band to call attention to social injustices in the first stanza and then call for an uncompromised forgetting of the aforementioned social issue in the chorus.

Cavity, the latest track by PPP, is a fractured, impressionist saga about going to the dentist overlaid with sweet synth tones that would make the keyboard guy from Depeche Mode weep for lost opportunities. I haven't spent as much time with this track so I don't know how it will stand up against the first two but this boy reporter has drunk the kool-aid and it is made of magic miracle milk. Besides, look at the graphic for the single.

So that is it, I admit that I know practically nothing about this threesome except that they are based in Tokyo and that they sometimes dress up as cows but the exotic cadences of their accented english laid over the synth hooks and electro beats gets me every time. I have played the nippples at least once a day since my first exposure and am looking forward to more of their deadpan "brain damaging pop".


PPP=trippple nippples a digression

Punch the letters PPP into wikipedia and the list that comes up is a potpourri of political peoples parties, absent from wikipedia's entries is the only example of the acronym which promises to shoot miracle nipple milk all over your tupples(whatever those are). But wait, you say, how can a band called trippple nippples abbreviate itself as PPP? I refer you to the diagram above. I vaguely remember reading about the use of this capital letter in this visually punning manner somewhere on the internet but I haven't been able to find it. Anyone with information on this please drop me a line.

Nota Brevis: In the course of my research I came across this video of Harajuku girls set against a PPP track and a short video of the girls in concert. Enjoy.




but never ever go here in search of anything, I warned you.

trippple nippples

and

Not my Demographic

As if I needed more proof than the "Left Behind" franchise that endtimes evangelical narratives lacked a compelling plot line, Rob Liefield, the bulgy arm, stringy face guy's "Armageddon" is painted in a style that i can only describe as raptural realism. Cynical atheist that I am, I'm inclined to think that this is just a sardonic gesture but paired with the confusing and overblown plot, I'm not so sure.
Something about Russia and this magic guy in Magneto's old helmet something something end of the world, then suddenly, "Little did he know that that the god of heaven had anticipated this move before the annals of time. All of their efforts would be brought to naught. No one would be able to stand against the divine plan of God." Dude, why didn't you tell me back on the first page that God was gonna fix all this? I don't even need to read anymore, I'm just going to stop right at the bottom of page six.
Speaking of pages, Liefield, what the hell happened on the bottom left of page thirteen? God, come fix this layout!
Don't worry comics fans, there is plenty of modestly clothed T&A for you to slobber, I mean pray over. Someone is going to like this book, it just isn't me. Maybe the Home-school crowd, starved as they are for pop culture. I give this a resounding, "NOT MY DEMOGRAPHIC!"

Armageddon
via

Eew, memes or 78% complete

This a foods you must try meme that has been knocking around for a while. I haven't trusted memes since I read Kaleidoscope Century but this one seems harmless enough, right Onetrue?

1. Venison: good any which way you cook it
2. Nettle tea: like mint but milder
3. Huevos rancheros: an awesome dish
4. Steak tartare no
5. Crocodile no
6. Black pudding: I used to get this with the Happy Chef's great British breakfast, unfortunately not so great
7. Cheese fondue: only on special occasions
8. Carp no
9. Borscht: cold and hot
10. Baba ghanoush: so good
11. Calamari: best grilled
12. Pho: I like it without the beef tendons and tripe
13. PB&J sandwich: even better than pb and j is pb and apple butter
14. Aloo gobi: I make this at home
15. Hot dog from a street cart: nuff sed
16. Epoisses no
17. Black truffle: I don't see what the fuss is about truffles
18. Fruit wine made from something other than grapes: does dandelion wine count?
19. Steamed pork buns: Yes yes yes and yes again
20. Pistachio ice cream: another easy one
21. Heirloom tomatoes: yes
22. Fresh wild berries: yes, my favorites are salmon berries and huckleberries
23. Foie gras: They tried to make this illegal in Illinois, it should be illegal not to have tried this
24. Rice and beans: so many variations
25. Brawn, or head cheese: in a bowl of vinegar and oil at a Bavarian Braurei
26. Raw Scotch Bonnet pepper: do not rub your eyes after eating this
27. Dulce de leche: the best dulce de leche is made with goat's milk
28. Oysters: Rockefeller or in the half shell or in a poorboy sandwich
29. Baklava: all time favorite desert
30. Bagna cauda no, this looks so good, I will have to make this
31. Wasabi peas: ehh
32. Clam chowder in a sourdough bowl: I hate anything that comes in a bread bowl. I'm sure it could be good but the stews rarely hold up to the quality of the bread.
33. Salted lassi: or the similiar Ayran
34. Sauerkraut: mit pierogie
35. Root beer float: A&W is my soda of choice
36. Cognac with a fat cigar: once and I have been chasing the sensation ever since
37. Clotted cream tea: or clotted cream coffee or clotted cream anything
38. Vodka jelly/Jell-O: from a stripper's belly button or in a glass?
39. Gumbo: taught me to love okra
40. Oxtail: in a soup
41. Curried goat: or any other kind of goat
42. Whole insects: chocolate covered ants
43. Phaal no
44. Goat’s milk: much better than the cow stuff
45. Malt whisky from a bottle worth £60/$120 or more: once and only once
46. Fugu no
47. Chicken tikka masala: can't make it at home yet though
48. Eel: barbecued in sushi
49. Krispy Kreme original glazed doughnut: doesn't belong on the list, blah
50. Sea urchin: not great
51. Prickly pear: peeling one now
52. Umeboshi
53. Abalone
54. Paneer: check out my recipe for homemade paneer here
55. McDonald’s Big Mac Meal: (insert sound of me barfing)
56. Spaetzle
57. Dirty gin martini no
58. Beer above 8% ABV: my favorite is the belgian stuff
59. Poutine no
60. Carob chips: my mother fed me these until I was old enough to demand chocolate
61. S’mores: overrated
62. Sweetbreads no
63. Kaolin no
64. Currywurst: miss them much
65. Durian: otherwise known as "ass fruit"
66. Frogs’ legs: like frail chicken
67. Beignets, churros, elephant ears or funnel cake
68. Haggis
69. Fried plantain
70. Chitterlings, or andouillette
71. Gazpacho
72. Caviar and blini no
73. Louche absinthe no
74. Gjetost no
75. Roadkill no
76. Baijiu no
77. Hostess Fruit Pie: another non starter for me
78. Snail
79. Lapsang souchong
80. Bellini
81. Tom yum
82. Eggs Benedict
83. Pocky
84. Tasting menu at a three-Michelin-star restaurant. no
85. Kobe beef no
86. Hare
87. Goulash
88. Flowers
89. Horse
90. Criollo chocolate no
91. Spam: at a plate lunch plate on the other side of the big island
92. Soft shell crab
93. Rose harissa no
94. Catfish: hork
95. Mole poblano
96. Bagel and lox
97. Lobster Thermidor no
98. Polenta
99. Jamaican Blue Mountain coffee
100. Snake no

True Playah

It's not often that I devote this much space to a record review, my usual method of music acquisition involve a frenzied search through music blogs like Gimme Tinnitus, Sheena Beaston or places like this and scavenging what free singles they have to offer. I am like a mendicant monk, accepting only what the flow of karma and the beneficience of bands allow into my crude wooden bowl.
So it was with some trepidation that I purchased the latest album by Joe Webb. What effect would this crass gesture of commercialism have on my place on the karmic wheel? Would this action cause me to be reborn as a Creutsfeldt-Jakobian prion in the vast wastelands of Britney Spears left Temporal Lobe? Do prions have souls? If so, where do they stand in the heirarchy of the afterlife? Is it better to be reborn a prion or an AIDS virus? Would this album suck? All of these questions crossed my mind as I downloaded Cross Country.
In the interests of transparency, I must admit that Joe Webb is not a stranger to me. Joe was a key player in my failed student presidential bid back at UM Augsburg campus. Joe was also almost responsible for my early demise as it was his elbow which caused me to fall from the window sill I was perched on while electioneering (in his defense he also pulled me back into the aforementioned window). I narrowly lost the election (53% to 45%) through no fault of Joe's. Perhaps I shouldn't have run on the "case of Schlitz in every dorm fridge" platform.

Cross Country by Joe Webb

From the opening bars of Joe's arrangement of Fiddy's "In Da Club" you can hear the depth of thought that has gone into this record. It could have been just a novelty item, existing in the virtual space of the itunes record shelves somewhere between Wierd Al's ouevre and the twisted humour of bands such as Ludichrist but the sincerity in Joe's voice prevents any such classification. It's a bold move to open with this song, any one with a radio has heard this track since it's release in '03 and anyone with a brain has since grown tired of hearing Fiddy's half literate attempts to string two words together. Despite the source material this cover shines. The fiddle which underscores the lyrics sounds like it belongs in a Hank Williams song of remorse and sorrow and so it is a surprise to hear the bright vocals announcing where Joe and Fiddy can be found. Joe brings out the inherent simplicity in this song, reveling in it's nursery rhyme structure. It is due to the lightness of the melody that the lyric's meanings are brought to the fore.
In the next track Joe extends some "Southern Hospitality" to his listeners via Ludicris' '00 hit. Joe's melancholy voice is a delightful counterpoint to the boastful and arrogant lyrics.
Track three is Jermaine Dupri and JZ's "Money Ain't A Thing" dropped over an urgently picked bluegrass melody. You can hear the two rapper's trying to one up each other lyrically as Joe manages to cram the dense lyrics into three mintes and fourteen seconds (a minute shorter than the original).
Lil' Flip's '02 single, "The Way We Ball" is given the Webb treatment next as Joe snarls out the lyrics to this 3rd Coast anthem. I have to admit that I wasn't familiar with this track before this review and had to scramble to find it on youtube and am listening to the original as I write this so I don't have a lot of insight regarding Lil' Flip's intentions. Just know that you wil be humming Joe's version whenever you ball.
Every playah knows this next track, DMX's "Ruff Ryder's Anthem", originally dropped in 1998 over a faux Wu-Tang beat. Joe's lush arrangement calls attention to the anthemic qualities creating a footstomper that you won't be forgetting soon.
JZ's "I Just Wanna Love U" sounds so sweet under Joe's hand, like something you would play for your girl after you had a terrible fight about something. Careful you don't accidentally pop it into your next mixtape for your honey, the lyrics are raw but sound oh, so good.
Biggie's "Big Poppa" bounces next, Joe has removed all traces of the over sampled g-funk of the original and given us a new way to looka at the Notorious B.I.G.'s lyrical excellence. Joe has manged to remove all of the menace and anger from the track without even cracking a grin. If this is satire, then it is deadpan.

To sum up, Cross Country by Joe Webb is an excellent reimagining of some of the seminal moments in recent music history. It is available on itunes.

My God, it's full of WIN!

HORSE PORN