Saturday, December 1, 2007

I Hate Third Person!

The OverDrone is no more! Long live The OverDrone!
I have a confession to make folks. Way back in August when I started this lil' blog I was a civil servant, working for city government. My position put me under a lot of scrutiny so I didn't feel comfortable using my real name.
Anyone who has checked my Blogger profile recently will know that I do not operate this blog anonymously anymore, in part because I do not work for the city anymore. I am using the free time I have to write vigorously and hopefully, profitably.
So no need to pretend that I, Jethro "Jet" Fisher am The OverDrone. Nope, not me. The OverDrone is actually an alien artifact discovered by yours truly while digging post holes in my backyard. Digital and SLR cameras simply do not work on it and even while I was sketching the above drawing I could feel my mind being flensed, nanometer by nanometer. To this day I can't remember my wife's birthday.
Anyhoo, once I brought it inside and cleaned it up it seemed like a great idea to get a DSL line with a WiFi signal. Funny that, because we were perfectly happy with dial up before that day. So began the subtle reign of The OverDrone. I began to dream of Kool-Aid colored alien fields and the b and c segments of a mating triangle whose names in English loosely translate to Betty and Veronica. The rest of the family exhibited strange behaviors as well, constructing nests in the corners of their bedrooms made of chewed up paper and Potato Buds.
Clearly we were under the influence of this petrified remnant of an interstellar culture. Buried under the thick Mid Western loam for milennia, deprived of it's advanced media and the psychic embrace of it's stable tripod marriage it went a little insane, even for an alien. It's harmless really, apart from it's addiction to los interwebs and it's insistence that I post regularly. Sometimes it uses my body to prepare and eat a peanut butter, pickle and cheese sandwich but I have gotten used to the taste and apparently they are a great delicacy on it's homeworld.
I can talk now because it is busy playing Super Mario Galaxy in my son's brain. It has told me that platformers are considered the highest art form back in the old country. I just wanted to tell you guys and girls who read this why I am switching from third person to first person in this blog. From now on The OverDrone is an entity separate from Jet Fisher but one that I work for. Now I will say things like "Here at The OverDrone..." or "The OverDrone asked me to..." but no more of that awkward third person. It was really getting on my nerves. I negotiated with the beast and managed to buy my authorial voice for the small price of three Bubble Teas a month. I'm not proud of it but that's how it is.
Oops, it is having a hard time with the boss, I better go. We'll talk later.

No comments: